That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
