Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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