I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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