The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
So gin and wine won't be happening again
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
