he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
