it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
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