Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Randomize
