He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize