"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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