i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
