so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
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