Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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