hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
