He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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