I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
