we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize