therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
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After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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