How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
