You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
