you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Randomize
