How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
COCAINE IS GR8
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
