I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
