He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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