Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
