He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
