i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
