I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
