im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
