i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
