she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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