At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
