thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize