I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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