why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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