allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Randomize
