so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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