imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
