I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
did i walk over a car last night?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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