why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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