Quick, to the slutcave!
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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