he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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