bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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