Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
