Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
this will be a night to untag.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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