wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize