Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
