I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
