How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
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