I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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