When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
