i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
